Day of ScalziLovehate!

So, today on Twitter, I noticed my friend (and evil nemesis) John Scalzi complaining that the people saying mean things about him on Twitter just  weren't interesting enough in their hate.  Exact quote: 

@scalziI don't mind mean, nasty things being said about me, @jer_ . Just make them, you know, INTERESTING. Boring meanness is boring

Well, as Scalzi is my evil nemesis, I feel I need to do something about this.  (Note that I don't think I'm his evil nemesis.  It's mostly just a one-sided thing, perpetuated by some goofy friends of mine, that baffles dear Scalzi.  For fun, google the Scalzi award and Scalzibane, if you're curious.)

Anyway, I'd declaring today a day of ScalziLovehate!  Next time he searches for himself on Twitter, I want his search results to turn up the most awesome list of interesting meanness that has ever existed.  So, go forth and tweet with the tag #scalzilovehate and see what you can come up with.  (But keep it tasteful, folks.  And interesting.  Very, very interesting.  And if you have trouble with interesting, I'll settle for just plain odd. See example below.)

I'll start: As a midwife for llamas, Scalzi's abilities are decidedly lacking. I mean honestly, does he think that stapler is effective? #scalzilovehate